Divorce proceedings and the emotional journey

Jennifer peebles portrait.

Jennifer Peebles

Partner

Phone 01264 325823

Email jpeebles@bsandi.co.uk

It is often said that divorce is up there with life’s most stressful events.

 As lawyers who deal every day with the huge range of issues that separating couples go through, we see the full extent of the challenges. It is certainly true that, as fairly commonplace life experiences go, there are few more difficult than divorce.

 Clients sometimes struggle to rationalise the emotional turmoil that is affecting them. That is particularly so where they are certain that divorce is the right thing for them and their family. Whatever the circumstances, divorce is a big deal. It marks the end of an arrangement that perhaps once worked beautifully. It is the separation not just of two individuals but of the past and future financial, social, and emotional bonds between them. It’s the end of something and in that sense the feelings are grief-like.

 Sadness is one aspect of this. There may also be anger, shock, pain, blame, fear, anxiety and denial. Imagine that range of emotions filling a person’s being  - and then asking them to think clearly and logically about the terms on which they should divorce. Imagine having to disentangle your joint finances and other contributions to the marriage. Imagine having to take a black and white approach to acting in your children’s best interests. Imagine having to negotiate with the person you’re walking away from.

 It’s difficult; there’s no denying that. The important fact to bear in mind is that a good family lawyer will understand and support your emotional journey. They’ll help you make the right decisions and to keep your feelings in check when that is what’s needed. They’ll help you find the inner strength to do what needs to be done.

 Divorce is just part of the process of putting the past behind you and starting afresh. If divorce is the right thing for you and your family, it will set you on the new path towards the life that you want to lead moving forwards.

 For more information please contact Sandra Machin or Jennifer Peebles on family@bsandi.co.uk

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